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Reading Time: 8 minutesLast Updated on June 8, 2025 by Paul Clayton
Table of Contents
8 Reasons Why Fighting Fair is Futile
When most people think about what they would do in a physical confrontation, they tend to envision a “fair” fight and often revert to their reactions in a real-life situation.
However, the problem is that there’s usually no such thing as a fair fight. If it’s fair, it’s not a fight; it’s a competition. Treating every fight as a life-or-death situation is the best approach. After all, if they try fighting without letting you have any choice, you’re entitled to do anything to win.
Key Takeaways:
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- Avoidance is Paramount: The fundamental rule of self-defense is to avoid physical confrontation whenever possible. Retreating and de-escalation are the safest strategies.
- No “Fair” Street Fights: The concept of a “fair fight” is a fallacy in real-world self-defense. Street fights are not competitions with rules; they are unpredictable, dangerous, and often involve an opponent who will use any means necessary to win.
- Fight to Win (if Necessary): If a physical confrontation is unavoidable and your safety is at immediate risk, you should fight with the intent to stop the threat as quickly and decisively as possible, using any effective means available, without concern for “fairness.”
- Understanding “Unfair” Fighting: “Fighting unfairly” is not primarily about “dirty tricks” like biting or eye-gouging (though these can be effective if properly executed). Instead, it means not fighting on the opponent’s terms, utilizing strategic advantages such as preemptive strikes, shock factor (e.g., screaming), and leveraging training.
- Limitations of “Dirty Tricks”: Many common “dirty tricks” are challenging for untrained individuals to execute effectively, especially under the influence of adrenaline. They require precise timing and technique, which are often lacking without proper training.
- Training is Essential: Effective self-defense (including “unfair” fighting) stems from consistent training. You “fall to the level of your training,” meaning what you practice is what you’ll do in a real fight.
- Legal & Ethical Considerations: While fighting to win, it’s crucial to consider the legal implications of excessive force and the potential for unintended permanent harm or revenge attempts. The goal is to stop the threat and escape, not to inflict unnecessary injury.
First Rule of Self-Defense: Don’t Fight
The first rule of self-defense is never to initiate a fight with anyone. Do everything you can to avoid a physical confrontation. You will always win 100% of the time in fights you were never involved in or avoided. I always tell my readers to say they don’t want to fight when confronted. Keep saying you don’t want to fight, and back away as soon as possible. 99% of the time, whatever it is, peters out.
Avoiding street fights is the best self-defense advice, as experience has shown that they are far more dangerous and less glamorous than people often think.
First, most street fights are usually over some bulls**t, small ego s**t.
Fights over nothing worthy. In most situations, street fights have nothing to do with defending yourself from harm.
Secondly, it’s easy to do or receive life-long injuries or even kill/die in ways you never anticipated.
Finally, perhaps more importantly, and what brings me to the context of our topic, is that you’re usually at the complete mercy of a total stranger. Your opponent cares less about the fighting rules and will kick you even when you’re down, steal your stuff, etc.
Therefore, if you find yourself in a situation where you’ve no choice but to hurt your opponent, hit them hard and quickly.
Of course, as I mentioned earlier, you should never get into a fight. Try avoiding confrontation as much as possible. However, if it becomes physical and the aggressor is the initiator, you’re legally protected and have the option of self-defense. It’s particularly true if you consider your life or well-being at immediate risk and have no idea what harm they can do to you.
And the thing is, if you’re genuinely defending yourself against harm or danger, you don’t have to worry about Queensbury rules or the off-limits illegal punches and what others will think later.
Instead, please do everything you can and fight as if your life depends on it. Your actions should be as brutal and lethal as possible. Nothing should be off-limits in such a situation, and you should never fight fair.
Why There’s No Fair Street Fight: What is Fair Fight
For any sensible person, there’s nothing like a fair fight.
First, a sensible person wouldn’t want to get into a fight, even if they think they can win. It isn’t fair if one person doesn’t want to fight, but the other is trying to force them to fight.
Secondly, there’s nothing like a fair fight, especially if you don’t know your opponent’s full capabilities. This is a literal definition of an unfair fight situation. You don’t know your opponent’s potential or even whether they have weapons on them, which puts you at a disadvantage. It’s unfair.
The third reason is that the goal of any fight situation is to win. It would be best not to put your safety in a street fight for others’ opinions. Do whatever you can to get that win. In a street fight situation, nothing is off limits; what matters is that you beat their ass and won, not the other way around.
Ultimately, street fights have distinct dynamics compared to organized fights or competitive sports. The problem with street fights is that everyone usually has a plan until they get punched in the nose. The street fights typically don’t play out as you would imagine. They’re much faster, with more charged combatants, and you can never bet on ideal circumstances. There are so many variables in a street fight that could put you at a disadvantage.
Fair Fight Definition
Fair fight can be interpreted differently, depending on the context. The most common definition, or rather a version of a fair fight, is a competition or battle that adheres to specific rules and regulations. Most of these fights are seen in sports fighting competitions such as boxing and kickboxing.
In other situations, fair fights can be witnessed when a fight is considered morally just or equitable.
In most cases, combatants engaging in a fair fight claim to be fighting for something, but in reality, they’re just fighting to be seen fighting. Additionally, neither party typically wants a severe outcome. It’s akin to showboating, which is why the concept of a fair fight is complex and nuanced.
It’s also arbitrary. It’s like telling one of the combatants not to use a high ground because it’s unfair.
Some argue that the importance of a fair fight lies in the fact that the outcome is determined by skills and strategy, rather than factors such as cheating, physical strength, mental advantage, or other resources. On the other hand, others argue that fairness is less desirable, especially in survival situations.
But ultimately, my thought on this is that street fights shouldn’t be fair, regardless of the circumstances or your values. You can’t put your life on the pretext of upholding fairness while your aggressor cares less about it.
Fighting Unfairly VS Fighting Dirty
You need to understand that when I mean “not fighting fairly,” I’m thinking less about stuff like biting, groin strikes, eye gouging, etc. Instead, my definition of an unfair fight is not fighting on the enemy’s turf or your aggressor’s terms.
This highlights the importance of learning self-defense and mastering the fundamentals of martial arts. After all, there’s an old saying: ” Learn the rules so you know how to break them properly.”
Of course, you need to have some dirty tricks up your sleeves in case your combatant decides to fight dirty. However, the truth is that most dirty tricks are usually weak and are often employed by individuals who lack effective fighting strategies.
I’ve been a self-defense expert for several years now, and it’s hilarious how many people without martial arts experience think they can easily win a fight by fighting dirty. This is a widely held opinion, especially among men without martial arts or combat training; they believe they can win any street fight because they won’t fight fairly and will persevere with this mentality.
Of course, if executed properly, a dirty technique is effective. Eye gouging, kicking the balls, biting fingers, and grabbing your opponent’s face are all effective techniques to stop a fight. Grabbing hair is also enough to make your opponent change directions quickly.
However, punching someone in the face or kicking them in the groin is another matter altogether. I can tell you that it’s more complicated than you think. Additionally, most of the illegal dirty tricks aren’t particularly effective, and for untrained or unfit individuals, it’s challenging to execute them effectively, especially when under the influence of adrenaline.
For example, kicking the balls is an effective dirty technique, and I’ve been kicked square in the balls. It did suck, but I never went down. If I were in a street fight, I would have beaten my opponent harder than I had planned.
Eye pokes are also another famous dirty trick. It’s effective if well executed, but the problem is that it’s usually tough to poke someone in a street fight. In most cases, the combatants are typically close up.
Most fights happen so fast that you don’t have time to think. You won’t have the time to execute your dirty tricks because fighting is a reaction, and you only fight as you train. So, unless you train how to grab the balls or bite, you won’t use these tricks in a fighting situation and won’t do anything.
Think about all the women with sharp fingernails and teeth who’ve been sexually 
harassed. Most are within arm’s reach of the aggressor’s most sensitive part of the male anatomy, and we rarely hear a woman who clawed their attacker’s penis or gouged their eyes.
Nothing sums up all of this more than the Greek poet Archilochus’s quote, “You don’t rise to your level of expectations, but fall to the level of our training.”
I believe fighting unfairly is learning more about self-defense, knowing where, when, and how to hit, hitting hard, and, more importantly, optimizing the process to increase your chances of winning.
For example, I’ve had as much success with preemptive strikes as hitting your aggressor when they least expect it and screaming as you launch your attack to maximize the shock factor. This is more of what I usually think about unfair fights: not fighting on the aggressors’ terms or using dirty, cheap tricks on them.
Unfair Fight Considerations
With that said, you must remember a couple of things if you decide to fight unfairly.
Legality
It would be best if you considered the legality of your action. Self-defense aims to protect you and your loved ones from harm. But depending on the situation, it’s also easy to go too far in the other direction and end up in prison. Permanently maiming your aggressor is also not appropriate in an altercation.
Revenge
Fighting dirty may also escalate the fight, and in some cases, it invites revenge attempts from the aggressor.
This video has been included to clarify the topic. Credit goes to Doc David
Final Thoughts
Fighting fair is a concept that doesn’t apply to real-life self-defense situations. The first rule of self-defense is to avoid physical confrontations altogether. Street fights are unpredictable and dangerous, often resulting in serious injuries or worse. There’s no fair fight in a street fight, as you can’t predict your opponent’s capabilities or if they have weapons.
The goal in any fight should be survival. If a physical altercation is unavoidable, fight with everything you have, and don’t worry about adhering to fair play rules. Utilize simple and effective self-defense techniques to incapacitate your attacker quickly. Legal considerations are crucial; self-defense should be justifiable to avoid legal trouble.
Street fights differ significantly from organized fights, with numerous variables that can put you at a disadvantage. Therefore, mastering basic self-defense and martial arts techniques is essential for optimizing your chances of surviving an unfair fight. Always prioritize your safety and the safety of your loved ones over the notion of a fair fight.
